Cleaning house physically, emotionally, and mentally.

Bambi – I’m talking to you! As I’m rolling out of the garage this morning, I noticed crap on the driveway. Literally, deer poop, deer pellets, whatever you want to call it. Four feet away is a huge yard, nice grass, soft for those tender hooves. And within 10 feet in the other direction is more lawn. So then why did you have to let ‘er rip in my driveway?

I drove through the deposits and when I park the car in the garage tonight, I may step in some bits and pieces from the tires. Then it will being tracked into the house. Don’t you think I have enough problems with Sunni and her #2 gifts without adding Bambi presents too? If I have to replace my rug because it is icky, then I replace it with wood floors. And that will just encroach on your environment. Let’s think of the big picture here, Bambi. You don’t poop in my driveway and I won’t cut down your forest.

Or maybe it was just karma for a discussion I had yesterday with a friend regarding the tastiness of venison sausage? Was that it? I have been a good and respectful neighbor. Don’t I always stop to let you cross the road? Have I ever hit one of your fawns? Don’t I let you gobble up all my perennials in the spring (yum, nice tasty tender shoots)?

Is this evidence of new animal activism? Should I be expecting cow pies on the driveway now because I eat ice cream? And let’s not forget bacon and eggs? Shall I run for cover from hogs and hens?

Bottom line (bad pun), be a little sneakier and hang out in my yard if you want to; just don’t poop on my driveway!

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Comments on: "I’ve Been Dissed by Bambi" (1)

  1. When you gotta go. I wouldn’t take it personally. Deer are not the calculating type and rarely eves drop in on conversations, especially about venison sausages. 😉

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